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23/2/15 07:16 pm
kittysour: (Default)
[personal profile] kittysour
 spoke to the manager and ended up crying. she spoke down to me so bad i felt like a little kid. i explained that i was so confused on what my jib was and how theres loads of negative stuff going round the nursery with most of it feelin like people are laughing at the fact that once again im the one who doesnt know anything.

her response was i shouldnt hav rang in sick last week and she would have told me, and how dare i expect her to ring me on her days off to explain that im needed in another room. i said i didnt need her to baby me (whilst sobbing lol) i was just annoyed that after being so excited to move rooms i was stopped again. she said that i should just treat it as a job and if people dont do their role then i shouldnt let it bother me. she knows i hate that. si then explained that a lot of people have been saying that other staff have been kicking off about what they can and cannot do. again i got a snotty reply about not listening to rumours and how im on,y doing certain jobs because its easier and why would i want it to be harder on other people?!

so basically i sat with her for about 40 minutes crying on and off trying to explain all the stupid stuff in my head, that basically stems from work. she complained that i had a lot of absences which all obvzly go back to my anxiety/depression, and i should just try to let it all go over my head and just keep thinking, its a job and look forward to home time. 

i feel so wrecked and that i didnt even get any of my points across because i was too busy trying not to cry and forgetting everything /o\ its the first time ive felt totally horrible since stopping my meds a couple of months ago

so i suppose i just go an do my job and not care like the rest of them, or drop my hours down to20hrs? or look for another job. im even thinking of just trying for a shop job until i pass my driving test (fingers crossed)
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